God’s Minister: Dearly beloved, we are gathered today on this mountaintop in beautiful Point Reyes, California to witness the peak of Tracy and Bobby’s love, the culmination of their quest for oneness with each other, a public avowal of their commitments to each other. Bobby, do you take Tracy to be your life partner for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, until God’s Great Cosmos shall end?
Bobby: I do.
God’s Minister: And Tracy, do you take Bobby to be your soul's constant companion through trial and tribulation, until all time shall be one in joy, and gravity shall cease to be, and your very molecules shall fly apart?
Tracy: I do.
God’s Minister: Tracy and Bobby have meditated on the meaning of their lives together, and they wrote their own vows, which they will recite now to seal forever the love they feel for each other.
Tracy: Bobby, I will love you forever. I will share your joys and your sorrows. Together we will face whatever Time and Space bring us. When you exult, I will rejoice. When you weep, I will taste salt. When age takes our bodies, my love will endure, forever and ever, Amen.
Bobby: Tracy, when you’re weary, feeling small, when tears are in your eyes, I will dry them all. I’m on your side. When times get rough and friends just can’t be found, like a bridge over troubled water, I will lay me down.
Bobby: When you’re down and out, when you’re on the street, when evening falls so hard, I will comfort you.
God’s Minister: Bobby?
Bobby: I’ll take your part when darkness comes, and pain is all around. Like a bridge
over troubled water, I will lay me down.
Tracy: Bobby, you son of a bitch.
Bobby: Sail on, Silver Girl.